Deep-Fried Cornish Game Hens

Yes, we deep-fried Cornish game hens. What?
Ingredients

• Cornish game hens (we used 2)
  
• a lot of canola oil
  
• tongs galore
  

There is nothing more harrowing than trying to deep fry Cornish game hens. First thaw the suckers. Then wash them off with water and pat as completely dry as you can, inside and out. Let them sit out for an hour (yes, really). Toward the end of the hour, begin to heat the oil to 350 degrees. You want 1) enough oil to come up about 2-3 inches from the bottom of the pot and 2) not enough oil that it will bubble over when you put the chicken in.

Oil heated, add the chicken. Use tongs or something. Two pair make it easier. Cook it until it's golden brown, turning occasionally to get all the sides. It'll take about 12 minutes. I recommend trying to let it sit for at least 4 minutes on each side without messing with it too much.

Pull the thing out and place it on a wire rack to drain the oil out. Pat dry if need be. Now is a good time to start scrubbing the grease off of everything in your kitchen.

Thoughts: in a word, terrifying. Otherwise, I have to say that while it turned out OK, I wouldn't deep fry again. The done-ness was great, and it was NOT dry at all, but neither was it really flavorful. Next time we try to make it we'll rub it down with herbs and bake it. Advantage to that approach is you don't have to risk horrendous disfigurement or death to eat a chicken.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Caramelized Rice Pudding

From Martha Stewart
Ingredients

• 1.5c whole milk plus 3/8c (eyeball it)
  
• 1/4c medium grain white rice
  
• 1/2tsp vanilla extract
  
• 1/8c white sugar + 2 tbsp or so
  
• 1/8tsp salt
  
• 1 egg yolk
  
• raisins
  
• some cinnamon (again, eyeball it)
  

Preheat oven to 350. Cook the rice in 1.5c milk in a saucepan with some raisins (as much as you like). Once the rice has absorbed most of the liquid (15-20 min?) remove from heat. In a separate bowl, mix the remaining 3/8c milk, 1/8c sugar, the salt, egg yolk, vanilla extract, and cinnamon. Pour it into the rice mixture, stirring constantly. Return it to heat and bring to a simmer. Divide it between two ramekins. Place them on a casserole pan or bread pan and add about an inch of boiling water to the pan with them (to kinda steam them as they cook) and bake about 15 minutes. Let them cool 10 minutes. Sprinkle the tops with sugar, and caramelize using a kitchen torch (or a broiler if you don't have one... we actually use a wind-proof lighter. Seriously.)

Thoughts: I really liked this a lot. Claire liked it "for what it was" but says that it was too rich that she didn't like the caramelized sugar on top. If she made it in the future, it would include more skim milk (less whole) and no caramelized sugar. I guess I was expecting it to be rich so I really enjoyed what I got.

Disaster Index: 1/10. But Claire probably wouldn't do it again. I, however, definitely would.

Twice-baked potatoes with blue cheese

Ingredients

• 2 sweet potatoes, scrubbed, and pierced several times with a fork
  
• 2 tbsp butter
• 2 tbsp chopped chives
• 2 tsp dried parsley
• 3 tbsp plain yoghurt (just play it by ear)
  
• salt and pepper
• blue cheese
  

Preheat oven to 400.
In the meantime, put the potatoes on a plate and put them in the microwave (MAKE SURE YOU'VE PIERCED THEM SEVERAL TIMES WITH A FORK). Microwave them on high for 10 minutes, or until they're cooked (sometimes it takes longer).
Meanwhile, in a medium-sized bowl, mix chives, butter, and parsley.
When potatoes are done, let them cool a little (not TOO much), then cut them open and scoop the potato out of the skins. Add the hot potato to the bowl and begin mixing. The potato should melt the butter during this process.
When you have a pretty good mash going on, start adding yogurt. Add until it attains the texture that you desire. I think we used about 3 tbsp. We didn't measure it.
Add salt and pepper, to taste.
Fill 2 ramekins with the potato mixture. Fill pretty close to the top. Then take your blue cheese and crumble it over the top of the potatoes. Again, however much you want to use. We actually mixed more in once we took them out of the oven.
Anyway, bake them in the oven for 20-30 minutes, until the blue cheese on top is bubbling.

Thoughts: This was super easy to make and super filling. The only bad part for you is the butter and the blue cheese. Sweet potatoes are pretty much the healthiest thing you can eat. So yeah, we were pretty pleased with this.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Cake in 5 minutes

In a mug, no less. In the microwave, no less.
Ingredients

• 4tbsp flour
  
• 4tbsp sugar
  
• 2tbsp dutch process cocoa
  
• pinch of salt
  
• 1/2 tsp instant coffee (optional - really adds to the chocolate flavor)
  
• 1 egg
  
• 3tbsp milk
  
• 3tbsp vegetable oil
  
• 3tbsp chocolate chips
  
• 1/2 vanilla or orange or almond extract
  

This is for serious. Mix the flour, sugar, cocoa, salt, and instant coffee in a microwavable mug. Stir (with a fork or something) and then add the egg. Stir until you get kind of a paste. Doesn't have to be perfectly combined. Add the remaining ingredients except for the chocolate chips, and stir until well combined. Add the chips and stir.

Microwave on high for 3 minutes (for a 1000W microwave) or a little longer otherwise (more on this in a sec). Serve with vanilla ice cream and a staggering sense of unreality.

Thoughts: I figured "heck, why not? If it doesn't work, I'm only wasting one egg." And it turned out. Pros: took five minutes. Pretty great flavor (really). VERY fluffy texture. Cons: A little on the dry side and a little rubbery. This may have to do with three things: 1) I didn't actually use chocolate chips when I made this recipe. They would have added a lot, I think, but I didn't have any. (The original recipe also suggested chopping up bits of candy bar if you don't have chips... I think they meant chocolate bars, but could you use a snickers bar? I PERSONALLY think this would probably be utterly disgusting, but I thought the cake would be too, until I tried it). 2) I didn't add vanilla / orange / almond extract. This, again, was a suggestion in the original recipe, but I didn't want to waste a precious commodity on what I thought would probably be a failed attempt at cake. The added liquid might have helped to keep the cake a LITTLE more moist. 3) I think the cake could have been microwaved just a LITTLE less. About half-way through the cooking, the cake rises above the lip of the mug (about an inch in my case). DON'T BE AFRAID OF THIS - it will go back down and not spill anywhere. The thing is, I think I probably could have turned off the microwave when it fell back to the level of the mug. But I let it keep going the full 3 minutes, and it was a TOUCH on the rubbery side after it started to cool. I bet that if you turn it off 20-30 seconds sooner, it'll be much moister.

Disaster Index: 3/10 - COULD ACHIEVE GREATNESS with a few minor tweaks. Problem is, it's probably tough to control minor tweaks like that. It's tough to play by ear with a microwave. STAY TUNED FOR UPDATES.

Lentil Soup with Italian Sausage and Escarole

Ingredients

• 1 and 2/3 cups lentils, rinsed well
• 5 cups water
• 3.5 cups chicken stock
• 2 bay leaves
• 4 garlic cloves, chopped
  
• 2 tbsp olive oil
• 1 lb sweet Italian sausage links, cut into 1" pieces
• 1 medium onion, finely chopped
• 2 medium carrots, finely chopped
• 2 celery ribs, finely chopped
• 2 tbsp tomato paste
• 1/2 lb escarole, rinsed and chopped (4 cups)
• 1-2 tbsp red-wine vinegar

Simmer lentils, water, stock, bay leaves, and half of the garlic in soup pot, uncovered, for 12 minutes.
Meanwhile, heat oil in a pot of medium-high heat until it simmers. Add sausage and brown for 7 minutes. With a slotted spoon, transfer sausage to another vessel. Keep the sausage oil in the pan.
Reduce heat to medium and add carrots, onion, celery, remaining garlic, salt, pepper, and cook until softened, about 5 minutes.
Stir in tomato paste and cook for 2 minutes.
Add sausage and lentils and cook for 3-5 minutes, until lentils are tender.
Stir in escarole and cook until tender, about 3 minutes. Stir in vinegar.

Thoughts: Delicious. The sausage was absolutely fantastic. I think we actually cooked it with some Marsala wine. But I can't remember. Meh. When you make this recipe, you might as well throw some in there anyway. There's no reason not to add alcohol to any dish you make.
Anyway, this was fantastic. I might even add more sausage.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Chicken & pasta with mango cream sauce

Ingredients

• 16 oz. pasta (rigatoni works well, but whatever)
• olive oil
• 2 skinless, boneless chicken thighs
• 1 onion, sliced and separated into rings
• 1 red bell pepper, julienned
• 3 cloves garlic, crushed
• 1 tsp fresh ginger, minced
• 1 mango - peeled, seeded, and chopped
• 1 cup whole milk
• salt and pepper
• parmesan cheese, to top

Cook pasta until al dente. Set aside.
Cook chicken with olive oil in a pan over medium-high heat for 10 minutes, or until juices run clear. What the hell does this mean? Who knows?
Cook onion and pepper in olive oil until tender. Mix in garlic, ginger, and mango, and continue to cook for 5 minutes, or until mango is soft. Pour in milk and cook until thickened, about 5 minutes.
Add pasta and chicken, and cook everything for a little bit longer (2-4 minutes), until chicken is all the way done and pasta is not al dente anymore (unless you like that sort of thing).
Eat.

Thoughts: The taste on this dish was pretty fantastic, but we used WAY too much pasta in relation to everything else. I would halve the amount of pasta down to 8 oz next time. Also, it would have been much more awesome if we had blended the cooked onion, pepper, mango, garlic, ginger, and milk together to make a smooth cream sauce. This was just way too deconstructed and uneven, if you know what I mean. If it were a cohesive sauce, there would be some mango flavor on all the pasta. The way we did it, there were huge sections of plain white pasta and some clumps of vegetables and mango. Not great. Not great.

Disaster Index: 3/10. Taste was good, presentation = not so much.

Coconut Sticky Rice with Nectarine

Ingredients

• 1.5 cups sushi rice
• 1.3 cups coconut milk
• 1/3 cup sugar + 3 tbsp
  
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 large nectarine, chopped

Wash rice well until water runs clear. Soak rice in cold water for several hours (preferably overnight).
Put rice and milk and sugar and salt in a pot and cook until the rice is done. Add more milk if necessary.
Put chopped nectarines on top.

Thoughts: Christ. Everything that could have gone wrong in this recipe did. The original recipe tried to get us to cook the rice by suspending it in a sieve over a pot of boiling water and steaming it. But we tried this for like, 45 minutes and it wasn't cooking. So we were like "screw this" and just boiled it as indicated above.
The nectarines were also awful. The original recipe calls for mango, but the only mango we had left was rotten, so we had to throw it out. And we were like "what other fruit could we use?" And all we had was a nectarine. The nectarine was not ripe. It was crunchy and tasteless. So we tried to cook it in some water until it softened. This took forever. And when it was done, it tasted awful.

Disaster Index: 4/10: Dan says 3 and I say 5.

Shrimp and Pork Pot Stickers

Ingredients

• 1 small (3oz?) can water chestnuts, chopped
  
• 1/2lb uncooked shrimp, peeled, deveined, and chopped
  
• 1/4lb ground pork
  
• 3/4c chopped scallions
  
• 1.5tbsp soy sauce
  
• 1 lobe ginger, peeled and minced
  
• 1tsp sesame oil
  
• 1 pack of wonton wrappers
  

This is pretty basic. Mix together the ingredients. Put in wonton wrappers. Then comes the fun part: figure out how to cook them. The original recipe says to fry them in oil, then add water and cover, cooking until the water has evaporated. This method keeps really true to the name "pot sticker", but was not terribly successful for us. Frying worked pretty well, but the wrappers got a LITTLE overdone for me. They were tasty, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't really worth the effort.

Thoughts: Maybe next time I would get different wonton wrappers... or, I don't know, plan on having them in a soup. We never tried just cooking them in boiling water. That might have worked. Probably steaming (on lettuce leaves?) would be the way to go, but it was late, and we were tired.

Disaster Index: 3/10 - provisionally. If we cooked them differently (steaming?) it would probably be more like 1/10.

Ma Po Tofu

or Dofu if you're cool.

Ingredients

• 1.5lbs soft (not silken) tofu
  
• 2tbsp chili bean sauce
  
• 1tbsp black bean sauce
  
• 4tbsp oyster sauce
  
• 1tbsp corn starch
  
• .25c peanut oil
  
• 4oz ground beef
  
• 1 lobe fresh ginger, peeled and minced
  
• 1tbsp garlic
  
• a few scallions, sliced
  
• 1/4c dry white wine (we actually used 1/8c mirin, and it worked?)
  
• 1 medium leek, cleaned and chopped
  
• 1/2c chicken stock (.5tsp bouillon plus water)
  
• 2tbsp soy sauce (we used a dark mushroom flavor soy sauce)
  
• cilantro, chopped (optional)
  

In a pot, bring water to a boil. Add tofu and remove from heat. Let it sit for 5 minutes, then remove from water and set aside. (I wonder what this does to the tofu...) In a wok or big pot, heat the peanut oil. Add ginger, garlic, scallions, and the beef and stir-fry until the beef is browned. Add the rice wine (or mirin) and cook until most of the moisture evaporates. Add the hot chili sauce, black bean paste, and oyster sauce. Stir together and cook for another minute until the oil separates. Add everything else except the corn starch and bring to a boil. Then add the corn starch (possibly whisked together with a little cold water) and stir until the sauce thickens. Top with chopped cilantro as desired. Serve over rice.

Thoughts: Claire thought this was a little spicy, but I really liked the amount of heat. Next time we'll probably add less chili sauce and we can do sriracha or something to taste. I felt that the leek was a little chewier than I'd have liked, and it didn't really add. I would replace it with more scallions. Also, the dish could have used a little more like 6oz of beef. Otherwise, it was really delicious.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Bran Muffins II

The ultimate bran muffins
Ingredients

• 1.5c wheat flour
  
• 1c white flour
  
• 1/2c honey
  
• 1/2c brown sugar
  
• 2.5tsp baking soda
  
• .75tsp baking powder
  
• 2c buttermilk or soured whole milk
  
• 1tsp salt
  
• 1tbsp cinnamon
  
• 3.5c All Bran cereal
  
• 2 eggs
  
• 1/2tsp ground nutmeg
  
• 1/2c vegetable oil
  
• 1/2c raisins
  

This is ridiculously easy. Preheat oven to 375. Mix all of the ingredients in a big bowl. It will be liquidy, but don't worry. Also don't worry about the whole All Bran cereal kicking around. It works. Trust me. Anyway, fill up a bunch of 1/2c muffin tins and bake for ~25-30 minutes.

Thoughts: These are SUPER delicious, very moist, not too sweet, and have a great crumb texture. The one thing is that they're hard to get out of the muffin tins, so you have to grease the tins really well. Otherwise, delicious.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Fried Rice 2

Ingredients

• ~2c leftover rice (where it's really dry)
  
• 8 stems of broccoli, chopped
  
• 2 large carrots or about 8 small ones, chopped up smallish
  
• 1/4 of a red onion, chopped
  
• 1tbsp chopped garlic
  
• 1tsp chicken bouillon (or veg)
  
• 1/2tsp soy sauce
  
• 1 lobe ginger, minced
  
• 1 egg, whisked
  
• salt, pepper, peanut oil, sesame oil
  

Heat peanut oil in a wide wok-like pot with garlic. Once it's a little cooked but not burnt, add the carrots, onions, and broccoli, ginger, sesame oil (about 2 tbsp), and a pinch of salt and pepper. Cook for a few minutes (5ish) until the carrots are tender. Push the veg to the side and pour the whisked egg into the pot. Stir the egg for ten seconds or so, then add the rice (the egg doesn't need to be done completely). Add the bouillon and the soy sauce and stir until the rice is warmed through and any clumps of rice are broken.

Thoughts: This actually tasted like fried rice should taste. Claire and I think it was the ginger and chicken stock that really made it. Texturally, the LEFTOVER rice is REALLY important - if you use fresh rice, it's just a gummy mess. Really, huge difference. In the future I would add some sauteed tofu or some chicken.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Zucchini Bread

Our first attempt at zucchini bread! Worked quite well. Makes 2 loaves or 1 loaf + about 9 muffins.

• 2 medium zucchinis, grated/skin on (we used a cuisinart attachment).
  
• 3 eggs
  
• 2c sugar
  
• 1c vegetable oil
  
• 1tsp vanilla
  
• 3c unbleached all-purpose flour
  
• 1tsp salt
  
• 1tsp cinnamon
  
• 1/4tsp baking powder
  
• 1tsp baking soda
  
• optional nuts or chocolate chips
  

Preheat oven to 350. Mix all of the dry ingredients together into a bowl. Add all of the wet ingredients and mix further. Easy, right? Pour half the batter into a 9x5 bread pan and the rest into a muffin tin... or else maybe you could make it more like zucchini-bread cake in a wider pan (like a casserole?). Bake for about 60 minutes and let cool 10-15 minutes before you try to turn the bread/muffins out.

Thoughts: I felt I could have used a LITTLE less sugar, though I'd have liked chocolate chips. Claire disagrees. This recipe takes a long time to bake. Make sure to take it out just a LITTLE early because of carry-over baking. Timing is tricky with this. For a single recipe I'd probably use 2 smaller zucchinis or one bigish one, 2 eggs, and half the other ingredients (except baking powder, which I would keep the same).

Disaster Index: 1/10

Croque Madame

I'm not quite sure how a croque madame is different from a croque monsieur, except that the monsieur has tomato. Is that the only difference? And croque madame has an egg on top?

Ingredients

• 2.5 tbsp butter
• 1.5 tbsp flour
• 1 cup whole milk (or as much as you can. We ran out and had to use 3/4 cup whole and 1/4 cup skim, which turned out just fine)
• 1/8 tsp salt
• 1/8 tsp pepper
• 1/8 tsp nutmeg
• 1/2 cup grated monterey jack cheese
• 4 slices white bread (we used sweet Hawaiian bread, which was awesome)
• however much mustard you want to put on your sandwich
• 2 large slices of prosciutto (1 slice/person)
  
• 2 large eggs

To make the sauce:

Melt butter in a saucepan over moderately low heat, then whisk in the flour and cook, whisking constantly, for 3 minutes. Whisk in the milk and bring to a boil. When it boils, reduce the heat to a simmer and cook for 5 minutes, stirring constantly. Add the salt, pepper, nutmeg, and 1/6 cup of the cheese. Cook until the cheese melts. Remove heat and cover with a sheet of wax paper (so a skin doesn't form on the roux)

To make the sandwiches:

While the roux is cooking, spread mustard on 2 of the slices of bread, and put the prosciutto on top.
When the roux is done, spread some of it over the other 2 slices of bread, then sprinkle with the remaining cheese.
Put the pieces of bread together so that they form a sandwich. Durrrr.
Heat a skillet or griddle and spray with nonstick cooking spray or olive oil. Once it's hot, place the sandwiches on it. Cook them for 3-4 minutes total, turning them once halfway. They should get nice and brown. Remove from heat.
If you'd like, you can cook the eggs at the same time. Our griddle is big enough to cook like, 10,000 things simultaneously, so we just did it at the same time as we did the sandwiches. Cook the eggs over easy such that the whites are set and the yolks are runny. You know how this works.
Prepare the broiler.
Top each grilled sandwich with the remaining sauce, spreading evenly. Cook under the broiler for 2-3 minutes, until the topping is bubbling. You might want to check periodically to make sure you aren't burning the sandwiches. There is nothing worse than a burnt croque madame, let me tell you.
Take the sandwiches out and top each one with a fried egg. Eat.

Thoughts: OH MY GOD THESE WERE ABSOLUTELY TRANSCENDENT. SERIOUSLY. THIS IS THE BEST THING WE'VE MADE IN A WHILE. SWEET JESUS THIS WAS GOOD. THE ORIGINAL RECIPE CALLED FROM GRUYERE BUT I THINK USING PEPPER JACK WAS A GOOD IDEA. OMG. I CANNOT RAVE ABOUT THIS ENOUGH. CAN WE GIVE IT A NEGATIVE RATING? Dan suggests using a firmer bread next time (the kind we used was more spongy than most). I don't think we need a firmer bread. But you know. We can try it. We will definitely be experimenting with other fillings and cheeses and whatnot. There's a version that uses smoked salmon as well, but Dan doesn't seem excited about that. Hmph.

Disaster Index: -5/10

Strawberry Tart

Ingredients

• 1.5 cups white flour
• 1.5 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 tsp cinnamon
• 6 tbsp butter, softened
• 3/4 cup sugar
• 2 eggs
• 2 tbsp whole milk
• 1 pint strawberries, hulled and cut in half (depending on the size of your pan, you may need less)

Preheat oven to 350. Lightly grease a spring-form pan. We used an 8.5 inch pan.
Mix together flour, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon in a bowl.
In a separate bowl, cream the butter and sugar. Add the eggs and milk. Mix the dry and wet ingredients. Do not overmix. This is important.
Spread the mixture into the bottom of the pan. Press the strawberry halves deeply into the batter, making several concentric rings.
Bake for 30-40 minutes, until a toothpick comes out pretty clean.

Thoughts: Pretty delish, and very easy to make. I might have sprinkled the top of the tart with sugar and cinnamon before baking it, just to add a little more flavor. The more strawberries you can fit on top, the better. Don't worry about making a pretty pattern. Just add all sorts of strawberries.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Chinese BBQ ribs with jasmine rice

Ingredients

• 2 lbs baby back ribs
• 1.5 tbsp peeled chopped ginger
• 1 tbsp chopped garlic
• 1/6 cup soy sauce
• 1 tbsp vegetable oil
• 1/4 cup hoisin sauce
• 1 tbsp honey
• 1.5 cups rice
• 2 cups jasmine tea
• 1 cup water
  

Preheat oven to 400 F. Put rack in middle position.
Puree the marinade ingredients together in a food processor.
Reserve 1/4 cup sauce and coat the ribs with the remainder.
Arrange ribs, meaty side down, in a broiler pan or a baking pan (lined with foil), and bake, turning the ribs and basting them with some of the reserved sauce about half way though. Bake for 30 minutes.
In the meantime, make the rice. This isn't difficult. Just make normal rice but instead of cooking the rice with water, do it with 2 parts jasmine tea and 1 part water.
Remove from oven. Turn on the broiler. Brush ribs, meaty side up, with the remaining sauce and put them under the broiler for 3 minutes, until there is char.
Eat.

Thoughts: Pretty damn good. This was the first time we attempted to make ribs, so we were pretty impressed with the outcome. I was worried they would be too dry, but they were not. I liked the chinese marinade, but in the future I would probably stick with traditional American BBQ sauce because I am a huge fan. Part of the ribs didn't cook all the way through the first time, so we can to throw those in for another 10 minutes, but they came out fine. The meat pulled away from the ribs pretty well, which was good. The jasmine rice was also pretty good. Not overpowering.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Shrimp and Orzo pilaf

Well, I don't know if this is exactly a pilaf, but it looks a lot like one. And it makes this recipe sound fancier.

Ingredients

• 1 lb frozen shrimp (ok, you're SUPPOSED to use fresh shrimp, but seriously, we're college students)
• salt and black pepper
• 1 medium red onion, minced
• 1 tsp extra virgin olive oil
• 2 tbsp of crushed/minced garlic
• 1 lb pastina (we used orzo and something that looked like spaghetti-o's)
• 4 cups chicken stock
• 1 cup water
• 1 28 oz. can of diced tomatoes, drained
• 2 tsp dried oregano
• 4 oz chevre, crumbled (if you CAN)
• 4 tbsp of chopped chives

Preheat oven to 400.
Combine olive oil, minced onion, and some of the salt in a stockpot of Dutch oven. Cover and cook on medium-low heat until the onions have softened, about 8-10 minutes. Stir in the garlic and cook until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Stir in the pastina and cook, stirring frequently, until the orzo is coated with oil and lightly browned, about 4 minutes.
Stir in the broth and water and continue to cook, stirring occasionally, until the pasta is MOSTLY tender but still firm in the middle (this is sort of tricky to do), about 12 minutes.
Stir in the tomatoes and oregano.
Pour into a 9x13 glass baking dish and put the chevre on top, in whatever form you think is best. Bake for 20 minutes.
In the meantime, thaw the shrimp until they are cool but soft.
When the pilaf is done, take it out and put the shrimp in it and stir it all around. This will warm the shrimp sufficiently to eat them without getting them all rubbery.

Thoughts: Pretty delicious, actually. I was sort of skeptical of the dish, but I was very pleasantly surprised. The original recipe calls for 1 large red bell pepper as well, but we didn't have one. But I would definitely put one in next time. The original recipe also calls for saffron, but seriously. Come on. The pasta was pretty difficult to get to the right consistency. I think you're aiming for al dente on this one, which is what the recipe is going for when it says cook "until the grains of orzo are mostly tender yet still slightly firm at the center". Why don't they just SAY al dente? Whatever. I think we may also have felt a little ambivalent about chevre. I mean, it doesn't really melt, so it just sort of sits on top of the pasta. I don't know. I doubt feta would be much better, since it doesn't melt either. Mozzarella? Maybe. Look into.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Apple Pie

Based on Alton Brown's recipe. Actually it's pretty much exactly it, just cataloged here for our use.

Ingredients

• For the crust
  
  
  
  • 1 stick unsalted butter, cut into approximate tablespoons
    
  • 2.75c white flour
    
  • 1tsp salt
    
  • 1tbsp white sugar
    
  • cold water
    
  
  
• The pie filling
  
  
  
  • 1/2c sugar
    
  • 3tbsp corn starch
    
  • 2tbsp apple jelly
    
  • 2tsp lemon juice
    
  • 1/4tsp salt
    
  • 1/4tsp ground grains of paradise
    
  • 5 apples (2 granny smith, 3 pacific rose), peeled, cored, and sliced 1/2" thick
    
  • 1 peach, sliced up 1/2" thick
    
  
  

In a food processor, combine all of the ingredients for the crust except the water. Give it a few good pulses. Then add water, two tablespoons at a time, and pulse a few times until the dough sticks together when you pinch it (it won't really stick together on its own, though). Form the dough into two discs, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate.

Now, peel and core the apples and slice into 1/2" thick slices. Toss together with 1/2c sugar and leave them in a colander for 1.5 hours. Preheat the oven to 450. Take the apples out (setting aside the liquid) and toss them (and the peach slices) with the jelly, the remaining sugar, the lemon juice, salt, grains of paradise, and the corn starch.

Take out one disc of tough and roll it out into a 12" circle. Place it in a pie tin and make sure it's neat around the edges and reaches the bottom of the pan. Place all the apples in concentric circles, piling them a little extra high in the center of the pie. Roll out the second disc and place it over all of the apples. Pinch the dough to the crust so that it won't come up, and then cut a 3" X in the top of the crust. Brush the crust with the remaining liquid from the apples (cooked down to 2tbsp?). Place the pie in the oven on the lowest rack for about 45-50 minutes.

Thoughts: Best. Pie. Ever. Next time we're going to try using more peaches, using some peach-vanilla jam, and upping the grains of paradise a little. Best served with some aged cheddar melted on top. Trust me.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Sweet Curry Powder

We ran out of curry powder the other day. Here is the recipe I used for sweet curry:
Ingredients

• 1/2 tsp ground coriander
  
• 1/2 tsp ground cumin
  
• 1/4 tsp turmeric
  
• 1/4 tsp ground cinnamon
  
• 1/4 tsp ground cloves
  
• pinch cayenne
  

Directions: mix spices.

Thoughts: Worked pretty well, I guess.

Disaster Index: 1/10.

Moroccan Potato Bean Soup

Ingredients

• 6 cups water
  
• 1 (15 ounce) can Cannolini / Great Northern beans
  
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
  
• 2 onions, chopped
  
• About 6 red potatoes, cubed
  
• 3 tablespoons chicken bouillon powder (or vegetable bouillon)
  
• 1/2 teaspoon ground turmeric
  
• 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
  
• 2 teaspoons curry powder
  
• 2 tablespoons soy sauce
  
• 1 cup whole milk
  
• 1/4 cup chopped green onions
  Chives, whatever else you like.
  

Sautee onions in olive oil until they're a little brown. Set aside. In a large pot, add the water and cannolini beans (we didn't drain them) and simmer for 15 minutes. Add everything except the milk and green onions and bring to a simmer. Cook until the potatoes are tender. Then add the milk and green onions and remove from heat.

Thoughts: this was pretty great. Claire thinks unreservedly that it was fantastic, but I think it had way too much salt. For the future, we could add some carrots. I discovered that a LITTLE bit of honey cut the saltiness by a lot and made it much more palatable to me. Something to consider.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Kung Pao Chicken

This is based REALLY loosely on a recipe I found online through NPR of all places.
Ingredients

• 2/3 to 1 lb of chicken thighs, cut into 1/2" strips
  
• 3 cloves garlic, chopped
  
• ginger to taste (maybe one lobe)
  
• 5 scallions chopped
  
• ~10 dried red chilies (didn't have these - I substituted for sriracha sauce later on)
  
• 1tsp sichuan peppercorns whole
  
• 2/3c roasted unsalted peanuts (I skipped this one)
  
• Marinade:
  
  
  
  • 1/2tsp salt
    
  • 2tsp light soy sauce
    
  • 1tsp mirin / rice wine vinegar
    
  • 2tsp cornstarch plus a little
    
  • 1tbsp water
    
  
  
• Sauce:
  
  
  
  • 1tbsp sugar
    
  • 1tsp cornstarch plus a little
    
  • 2tsp dark soy sauce
    
  • 2tsp light soy sauce
    
  • 1tsp mirin
    
  • 1tsp sesame oil
    
  • 1tbsp water
    
  
  

Get the marinade ready and place the sliced chicken in it and toss to coat. Let it sit while you get the sauce ready. Now, heat peanut oil (2tbsp?) in a wok and add the sichuan peppercorns (and the peppers if you're using them). Let that cook until it's fragrant - a few minutes (I'm not REALLY sure exactly how long). Now add the chicken and stir fry on high heat. When the chicken is starting to get a little more cooked, add the ginger, garlic, and scallions. Let it keep going until the chicken is fully cooked. Add the sauce and stir until the sauce thickens. (If you're using them, add the peanuts here). Serve over rice. Add sriracha to taste (a lot of it).

Thoughts: I really liked this. Sichuan peppercorns have a really unique flavor. The one thing is that when you bite down on them it makes your mouth tingly and leaves you with a slightly sour taste. But it goes perfectly in this dish. Claire feels that next time we should maybe cook the peppercorns and then remove them from the oil, adding them back in if we WANT (because she doesn't like to bite into them). This would give the dish the flowery aroma of the peppercorns without the tingly-ness. For the record, though, I liked the peppercorns... Anyway, next time I might use actual chilies, too, rather than just sriracha, but those like many ingredients aren't always readily available at Cap Centre Foods.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Bao

Ingredients

• Bread dough
• 2 packages yeast
• 1/2 cup lukewarm water
• 1 tbsp sugar
• 1 cup milk, heated to lukewarm
• 4.25 cups regular flour
  
• Filling
• 1 lb ground beef
• 2 green onions
• 1/2 tsp sesame oil
• pinch of salt
• 1 tbsp soy sauce
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1tbsp cornstarch dissolved in 1 tbsp cold water
• 2 tbsp liquid chicken stock (for the beef)
  
• 2 more tbsp dark soy sauce (for the beef)
  
• 1 tbsp dry sherry (for the beef)
  
• 1/5 tsp honey (for the beef)
  
• 3/4 tsp salt (for the beef)
  
• 1 large garlic clover, crushed or chopped (for the beef)

To make the dough:
Mix yeast into water and then add the sugar. Allow to stand for a while. Heat the milk up for about 30 seconds in the microwave, or until it feels warm. Add the milk to the water and yeast.
Make sure the milk is not too hot. This is very important.
Stir in the flour and knead until smooth. Place the dough on the counter and cover with a greased mixing bowl (make sure it's a pretty big one). Allow to rise until the dough has doubled in bulk, about thirty minutes. When done rising, punch the dough down and let rise for another 20 minutes until the bowl.
To make the filling:
While the dough is rising, prepare the filling. Put the beef (make sure it's either fresh or thawed) in a frying pan with all the ingredients labeled (for the beef). Cook until the beef is looking close to done. Add the other filling ingredients. Add more cornstarch as needed. Allow to cool.
To put them together:
Punch the dough down and knead for 1 minute. Pinch off a piece of dough about half the size of your fist. Press them into 4-5" rounds. Put an appropriate amount of filling in the center of the round of dough. With your fingers, gather the edges of the dough and pinch them together in the middle as best you can. Pinch the dough so it will hold. Place the filled bun pinched side down on a square piece of wax paper. Put in a bamboo steamer. Place buns a few inches apart, because they will expand during the steaming. If they stick together, it's no big deal. When steamer basket is full, cover the steamer with a lid and allow the buns to rise until not quite doubled in size (30 minutes). Steam the buns for 15 minutes.

Thoughts: This was hella complicated. The original recipe balls for barbecued pork, but we used ground beef instead. The original wants you to marinate the pork for several hours before cooking it up and putting it in the bao. That would have given them more flavor, which Dan says the bao definitely needed. The beef was still good, but not as good as BBQ pork would have been.
Next time we would let the dough rise for the full time. We cut the first rise short by half and hour. The dough was a little dense. We also overcooked the beef a little bit. Next time we should stop short of the full cook time because they cook a little extra in the steamer. Dan also thinks the dough could use a little more salt. Dan thinks that chicken would also be a good filler. You can always do this with vegetables too, if you WANT. Cabbage would be a good addition.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Silver Palate Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients

• 1 stick butter
  
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
  
• 3/8 cup granulated sugar
  
• 1 egg
  
• 1/2 tsp vanilla
  
• 1 cup all-purpose flour
  
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
  
• 1/ tsp salt
  
• 3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350.
Cream butter and sugars together until light and fluffy. We used the kitchen aid. It worked well.
Add egg and vanilla and mix well.
Stir in dry ingredients and mix thoroughly.
Add chocolate chips to the batter and form cookies. We use a small ice cream scoop to maintain a uniform size.
Bake on greased cookie sheet for 10-15 minutes.

Thoughts: These were pretty standard. They spread out a reasonable amount, and they were pretty thin. I prefer puffier, chewier cookies. These bordered on crispy. In the future, we would cut the amount of baking soda (which causes the cookies to spread out) and add more baking powder (which makes them puffier). Taste-wise, they were unobjectionable though. But this recipe isn't any better than any other chocolate chip cookie recipe. Pretty standard stuff.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Simple Berry Cobbler

Ingredients

• Blueberries & Strawberries (see below)
  
• sugar to mix with the berries - about 2tsp per ramekin.
  
• Where X is the number of ramekins you are making:
  
  
  
  • 1/4x c flour
    
  • 1/2x tsp baking powder
    
  • 1/8x tsp baking soda
    
  • 1x tsp butter, melted
    
  • 1x tbsp milk
    
  • 1 pinch salt
    
  • 1x tsp sugar
    
  
  
• Optional cinnamon, vanilla extract in any part you really want
  

Cut up strawberries (if you're using them) and fill the ramekins with blueberries and strawberries, leaving about 1cm room on the top. Put them in a 400 degree oven for about 20-30 minutes, until they're bubbling (a little) and hot. In the mean time, combine the topping ingredients in a bowl. You can mix it with a spoon pretty easily. Add flour or milk at the end until it reaches a medium-dry but slightly greasy dough consistency. Pinch it into separate pieces and form into discs to top the ramekins. When the ramekins come out of the oven, put the dough discs on top and return to the oven for an additional 15-20 minutes. Let them sit a few minutes before serving with vanilla ice cream.

Thoughts: This recipe is simple enough that you can make it for desert without any premeditation and without much effort, but the results are delicious. I've tried putting cinnamon in with the berries themselves and with the topping, and I've put vanilla in the topping. Any way you want. You know, there's leeway with this recipe. My only suggestion is: don't put the ramekins in the oven alone - put them on a baking dish, because the berries WILL bubble over and you WILL be sad when you're cleaning burnt sugar syrup off the bottom of your oven. Still, really good.

Note: the first time I did this recipe, it turned out WONDERFULLY, but the second time it was a little iffy. The dough didn't rise and the berries didn't really congeal. Next time, consider adding a little corn starch with the berries and (added since I tried it most recently) some baking soda in the dough. Finally, let it cook a little longer the second time around.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Asparagus Lasagna

Most of the directions are in the "ingredients". I've given them in the order they were prepared. I've made this twice so far, and this was the most successful version. I do all of the ingredients in one pot, incidentally. This works out to be about a half-batch, but I make it in a deep bread 9x5" bread pan.

Ingredients

• 1/2 of a largish vidalia onion or 1 medium onion, sauteed with olive oil until translucent
  
• 3c asparagus, (I'm guessing - bunched up they were about 2-2.5 inches diameter) steamed about 5 minutes until just tender
  
• 1 small zucchini or 1/2 of a large, sliced thin and sauteed in olive oil until tender
  
• 4 whole wheat lasagna noodles (yeah, only 4) cooked until al dente
  
• 14oz tomatoes, cooked with a spoonful of garlic and pesto (to taste). Cook down until reduced about 10-20% and a little thicker.
  
• 8oz ricotta cheese
  
• .25lb mozzarella (total ballpark), cut into thin slices
  
• salt and pepper to taste in just about every step of this
  
• Optional basil leaves
  

Preheat the oven to 350. Stir together the onions and the ricotta until well mixed. Put a layer of sauce at the bottom of the 9x5" bread pan. Thin layer. Add a layer of noodles (because of the size of the noodles, it does not take 2 full noodles to cover, so cut accordingly). Add a layer of ricotta/onions (about half the mixture). Add the asparagus, then another layer of sauce. Add another layer of noodles on top, then layer the zucchini across that. Top with the remaining ricotta, and any sauce that you might have left (once I didn't have any left, once I did - doesn't make much difference). If you are using basil leaves, place them evenly across the top at this point, and then cover the whole thing with slices of mozzarella. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes.

Thoughts: This is a delicious lasagna. It's also like my 3rd time ever making lasagna. I have to say, one of the most important things about this recipe is that you cook down the tomato sauce a bit. Otherwise it will be too liquidy and not as good to eat. Otherwise, this is super good. You could PROBABLY expand the recipe for use in a normal 9x11 sized pan (or however big) but the number of layers really necessitates steep sides, and if you make it in a bread pan then it's just enough for up to 3 people, or for 1 person with a few days' leftovers.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Oven Fries

Ingredients

• Any potatoes you have
  
• olive oil
  
• salt, pepper, parsley, rosemary, anything else you could possibly want
  

Peel the potatoes (you really probably don't have to, but we did) and cut them into wedges - about 10 per russet or sweet potato, though you can go more or less depending on the size. Submerge all of the slices in a bowl of water - that's right, water - and let them sit for 30 minutes. Preheat the oven for 475.

Done that? Fish the wedges out and pat them dry between two sheets of paper towels. Put them in a bowl and drizzle with olive oil. Add seasonings (be generous) and toss to mix (yes, you can use your hands). Spread the potatoes recklessly across a baking sheet and cover in foil. Put them in the oven and bake for about five minutes. Pull off the foil and let them go another 10 to 15. Take them out and flip them over. Back in for another 10-15 minutes.

If they look brown enough for you at this point (will probably depend on your potatoes / your oven) then take them out. Otherwise...

...you COULD leave them in for longer and hope they brown up, but I turned on the broiler for about two minutes. Check them OFTEN because they WILL BURN if you do this for too long. Makes them really crisp really fast. When they're just right, pull them out and serve. Caution everyone that they will be too hot to eat, and then burn your mouth trying to eat them anyway.

Thoughts: We've tried a couple oven fry recipes, and this is the most successful so far.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Fried Plantains

Plantains are good for you. Who knew?

Based on a recipe by Aaron McCargo Jr.

Ingredients

• One medium yellow-skinned plantain
  
• 2 tbsp neutral oil (I used peanut oil)
  
• 2-4 tbsp honey
  
• A little margarine (apparently optional)
  

Cut the plantain on a diagonal, with slices about 3/4" apart to create... a series of elipses, I guess. Anyway, heat the oil in a sautee pan or frying pan over high heat. When it's good and hot, drop the plantains in - make sure they don't stick together. Turn the heat down to medium-low and continue to let cook for about 3 minutes, until lightly browned on both sides. Add honey and margarine (actually, I think I added a little more oil) and stir to coat, cooking continually. Remove from heat and serve.

Thoughts: Plantains have this interesting flavor that's like a banana with a hint of lemon. And the texture is really unique, too. This was delicious served over french toast, and it's incredibly filling. One of my favorite new ingredients after this recipe.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Jambalaya

Ingredients

• 2.5 cups chicken stock
• 1 22-oz. can of whole tomatoes
• 1 chorizo sausage (ours was frozen)
• 2 cups fresh shrimp, tails off, deveined, all that good stuff.
  
• 4 chicken thighs (again, ours were frozen), cut into small chunks
• 1 cup long-grained rice
• 1 very small onion, diced
• 1 tbsp dried parsley
• 1 tbsp beef bouillon
• 1/2 tsp garlic powder
• 1/2 tsp savory
• 1/2 tsp ground black pepper
• 1/4 tsp cayenne
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 bay leaf

Thaw the chorizo and cook it until it's mostly done. Set aside.
Thaw chicken and chop it up. Set aside.
Put everything except the shrimp into a stockpot, large soup pot, or, ideally, a dutch oven. In a dutch oven, the rice won't stick to the bottom as it cooks. In everything else, it will.
Bring mixture to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat and set simmer for 20-30 minutes. A minute or two before the time is up, throw in the shrimp. Save the shrimp for very last because they're already cooked. If you put them in too early, they'll get all rubbery. And we don't want rubbery shrimp.
Eat.

Thoughts: This was sort of a complicated recipe, but my goodness, it was hella delicious. We added the chicken to the recipe, which was a fantastic idea (but don't do it unless you have leg or thigh meat). I'm surprised this recipe worked out so well, actually.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Rye cornbread muffins

Ingredients

• 1/2 cup cornmeal (plus extra, as needed - you'll see)
• 1/2 cup rye flour
• 1/8 cup sugar
• 1/2 tbsp baking powder
• 1/8 tsp salt
• 1/2 cup buttermilk
• 1/2 large egg, beaten (beat the egg first, then split it)
• 5 tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled

Preheat oven to 375 F.
Sift all the dry ingredients into a medium bowl (cornmeal, flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt).
In a separate bowl, whisk together buttermilk and egg.
Melt the butter. After it's cooled, whisk it into the buttermilk and egg mixture.
Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients; stir until just incorporated. If batter is too wet, add more cornmeal or flour.
Bake muffins about 15 minutes. Devour.

Thoughts: This is a halved recipe. It makes 6 muffins. Unfortunately, in the process of dividing the recipe, we forgot to divide the butter in half. So there's twice as much butter as there should be. This means that you do not need to grease the muffin tin. It also means that the muffins, while a little crumbly, will taste fantastically delicious. If you don't want fantastically delicious muffins, you can put in the correct amount of butter (2.5 tbsp). Also, the original recipe called for normal flour but since bugs have recently gotten into both our normal and whole wheat flour, the only thing we had left was rye flour. So we used that. And it was pretty good. You can tell the difference, but it's still predominantly delicious. I recommend crumbling these and serving them with the jambalaya.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Blueberry - Berry Cobbler

From the Best Light Recipe Cookbook.

Ingredients (filling, followed by topping)

• 6 cups berries (we used some fresh blueberries and some frozen berries)
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 2 tbsp fresh-squeezed lemon juice
• 1 tbsp cornstarch
• 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon


• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 3 tbsp cornmeal
• 1/4 cup sugar and 2 tsp sugar (for later)
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp baking soda
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1/3 cup buttermilk
• 3 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
• 1/2 tsp vanilla
• 1/8 tsp ground cinnamon

For the filling: Put oven rack in middle position and heat oven to 400 degrees.
Toss the fruit filling ingredients together in a 9-inch deep-dish pie plate.
Place pie plate on rimmed baking sheet and bake until fruit releases its liquid and is hot and bubbling around the edges. This should take about 20-30 minutes.
For the biscuit topping: Whisk the flour, cornmeal, 1/4 cup of the sugar, the baking powder, baking soda, and salt together in a large bowl. Set aside.
In a separate bowl, whisk buttermilk, butter, and vanilla together - set aside.
In a third small bowl, mix the remaining 2 tsp sugar and the cinnamon together. Set aside.
When the filling is done cooking, stir the buttermilk mixture into the flour mixture with a rubber spatula until just combined and no dry pockets of flour remain.
Remove the fruit filling from the oven and stir. Pinch off pieces of the biscuit topping and arrange them on top of the filling. We actually had extra biscuit topping left over, so you don't have to worry about spacing them.
Sprinkle the top of the cobbler with the cinnamon-sugar mixture.
Return the cobbler to the oven and cook until the biscuit topping is golden brown and the filling is again hot and bubbling. This should take about 15-20 minutes.
Eat.

Thoughts: Delightful. We made this for a 4th of July party and people pretty much snarfed it down. This is a fantastic recipe. You could probably do this with blackberries too. Or whatever berries you want.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Scottish Scones

I found this recipe on epicurious.com. I've modified it slightly. Who needs cream of tartar? Seriously.

Ingredients

• 2.5 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 tsp sugar
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 2 tbsp cold, unsalted butter, cut into 1/2 inch pieces
• 1 cup well-shaken buttermilk
• 1 large egg, beaten

Whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, and baking soda. Add the butter, and, with your finger tips, squish the butter into the flour mixture. By the time you're done, the mixture should resemble a coarse meal.
Stir in buttermilk and egg until soft dough forms. I had to add more flour to get it to be less sticky.
Turn out dough onto lightly floured surface, and cut dough into three equal parts.
Knead each piece 3-4 times, then shape into a 6-inch round (1/2 inch thick). Cut into 4 wedges.
Heat griddle over low heat, then add scones.
Cook undisturbed for 3 minutes over low heat.
Increase heat to medium-low and cook for another 3-5 minutes, until scones are puffy and undersides are golden brown.
Turn scones over and cook for another 6-8 minutes, until those sides are also golden brown. Adjust heat if necessary. Do not burn these.
Turn the scones on each of their edges for 1 minute, until the edges are golden brown.
Check the scones for done-ness.

Thoughts: These were absolutely fantastic. There is no need for us to try to find a better scone recipe. There is nothing that can match these. Also, they were done on a griddle, which is a fantastic way to do them. They were moist and fluffy on the inside and slightly crispy on the outside. I cannot sing the praises of these scones enough.

Disaster Index: 1/10

No-rise Scones

This is from Sundays at Moosewood.

Ingredients

• 1.5 tbsp butter, at room temperature
• 2 cups flour
• 1.5 tbsp sugar
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1/2 cup raisins
• 3/4 cup milk

Preheat oven to 450 F.
In mixing bowl, combine butter and flour with your hands, rubbing the lumps of butter between your fingers and thumbs. Add the sugar, salt, and raisins. Slowly stir in the milk, until a soft (but not sticky) dough has formed. DO NOT OVERKNEAD.
On a lightly floured surface, roll the dough out into a 1/2 inch thickness and cut out 2-inch rounds. Place them on a buttered baking pan.
Bake for about 20 minutes, until just beginning to brown.
Eat while hot.

Thoughts: This was dreadful. There is no other way to say it. Dreadful. Why the hell would this recipe not call for baking powder? The little blurb before the recipe says "oh no, baking powder is so bitter. This way, you can savor the taste of the flour". Bullshit. No-rise scones are not worth it. They came out super flat (obviously) and so they probably cooked for too long. They were totally rubbery and over-cooked in the middle. Moving away from the cookbook's inadequacies, I also probably overkneaded the dough, though I sort of thought that if you don't have a leavening agent, you can't overknead. Perhaps I was mistaken.
There's nothing else to say. These totally sucked. I cooked the second batch at 10 minutes rather than 20 in order to attempt to remedy the over-cooked nature, but it didn't seem to help much. They were softer, but hardly more edible.
Fellow bakers, do not ever follow a scone recipe that does not call for baking powder. SO not worth it.

Disaster Index: 9/10

Liquored-up French Onion Soup

Ingredients

• 4 cups of sliced yellow onions (we used a mandolin slicer. It was awesome)
• olive oil
• 1 cup medium-dry sherry
  
• 1.5 cups white wine
• 4 cups beef stock (or veg)
  
• 1 tsp salt
• freshly ground pepper
• goat cheese
• toasted croutons (optional)
  

In a large stockpot over medium high heat, saute the onions with the oil for about 20 minutes, until the onions turn a rich golden brown color.
Deglaze the pan with the sherry.
Simmer uncovered for 5 minutes.
Add the white wine and cook for 15 more minutes, still uncovered.
Add beef stock, salt, and pepper. Bring to a boil, then simmer uncovered for 20 minutes.
If you want to make croutons, simply grill (or toast) some stale bread and then chop that into small pieces.
Add the croutons to the bottom of your soup bowl, spoon in some soup, and then dot with goat cheese.
Eat.

Notes: This soup would have been delicious but there was TOO MUCH BOOZE. I made a semi-serious error and accidentally put in twice as much alcohol as was necessary. The measurements in bold are INCORRECT. Halve those numbers. That's how much alcohol you need for this recipe. No more than that. We tried to remedy the situation by boiling the soup and cooking the excess alcohol off, but I think we just ended up over-cooking the onions. SO. Dan didn't mind it as much as I did. I couldn't finish the rest of mine. He actually ate leftovers.
This recipe could be good if I knew how to measure things.

Disaster Index: 4/10 (with right proportions, there is hope. Stay tuned)

Corn Risotto

Ingredients

• 2 ears corn
• olive oil
• 1 small yellow onion, diced
• 5 strips turkey bacon
• 3/4 cups Arborio rice
• 3 cups chicken stock (or veg stock, if you must)
  
• additional water, as needed
• salt
• pepper
• parsley
  

Using a sharp knife, slice the kernels of corn off of the cob. You should have about 1 cup of corn.
Heat oil in a large saucepan. Add the onion and saute until soft and fragrant (about 8 minutes). Add the bacon and saute for another 5 minutes. Add the rice, and stir with wooden spoon to mix with the onions. Start adding the stock, about 1/2 cup at a time, adding more when the rice has absorbed the stock. Do this for like, 15 minutes, until the rice starts to get tender. Add the corn and stir. Add enough stock such that the rice is tender but not mushy.
Stir in parsley, salt, and pepper. Eat.

Thoughts: This was pretty easy to make and it was super delicious. The corn and bacon make the texture sort of chewy, which is pretty delightful. This is super tasty. That's all I have to say.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Mashed Sweet Potatoes with Orange

This is based off of a Food Network recipe.

Ingredients

• 4 sweet potatoes, skinned and chopped into medium-smallish sections
  
• 1/8 cup skim milk
• 1/4 cup freshly-squeezed orange juice
• 1 tsp orange zest
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1/4 tsp ground nutmeg
• 1 tbsp margarine
• 1/4 cup scallions, chopped
• salt and pepper, as needed
  

Put the potatoes in a large pot filled with 1/2 cup water. Cover, turn on medium-high heat, and steam until the potatoes are tender, about 8-10 minutes.
In a large bowl, mash the potatoes with the milk, orange juice, zest, salt, nutmeg, and margarine. When well incorporated, add the green onions, salt and pepper, and mix again.

Thoughts: This recipe was pretty much as easy as it looks. Except that I burned myself several times while trying to stir the potatoes in the boiling water. So, you know. Otherwise it was pretty painless (ho ho ho). The original recipe called for buttermilk rather than skim milk (and a lot more of it), but we didn't have any. I'm not sure if it would have been better with the buttermilk or not. I didn't feel like it could have used more liquid. I think the combination of the milk, butter, orange juice, and onions might have been a little too much. The onions were the last straw, I think. I mean, the taste isn't bad - there's just something that's sort of off about it.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Scalloped Potatoes

This is a recipe from "The Best Light Recipe" cookbook. Because this is a light rendition of scalloped potatoes, the calories contained therein are 210/serving vs. 410/serving. Not bad.

Ingredients

• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 1 tsp vegetable oil
• 1 tsp salt
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• fresh ground pepper - lots
• 5 medium yukon gold potatoes - though russets are better - peeled and sliced as thinly as you can get them
  
• 2 cups 2% milk - don't try to use skim. It won't be good. Just be glad it isn't whole milk
• 2 tsp cornstarch
• 1 tbsp water
• 3 tbsp light cream cheese
• 1 cup grated parmesan cheese

Heat oven to 450 degrees.
Combine oil, onions, and salt in a large pot. Cover and cook over medium-low heat, stirring occasionally, until the onion is softened, about 8 minutes. Stir in the garlic and pepper and cook until well-incorporated and fragrant, about 30 seconds.
Add the potatoes and milk and bring to a simmer. Cover, reduce heat to low, and simmer until partially tender (a fork can be jabbed into a potato slice with some resistence), about 10 minutes.
In a separate container, whisk the cornstarch and water together until well mixed. Then add to the pot and bring to a simmer. Remove from heat.
Stir in the cream cheese and 2 tbsp of the parmesan. Don't break up the potatoes, if you can help it.
Transfer the mixture to a metal baking dish and sprinkle with the remaining parmesan. Cover the dish with foil and bake for 20 minutes. Uncover and continue to bake until the potatoes are completely tender (a fork goes in easily) and the top is golden brown, about 10-15 minutes longer.
Let cool for 10 minutes before serving.

Thoughts: OMG this was delicious. It probably would have been more flavorful if we can used thyme and bay leaves, like the recipe recommended. But we didn't have those things and we NEEDED POTATOES NOW. So we did without. And it was still delicious. You can't even tell that this recipe is half the calories. It's totally better without whole milk and heavy cream. Yikes.
I have practically no criticisms. Maybe a little more salt? To each her own. Maybe it doesn't matter.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Portobello Pizza

Ingredients

• 2 large portobello mushrooms, de-stemmed and de-gilled
• olive oil
• goat cheese
• pesto
• salt
• pepper
• garlic powder
• tomatoes (grape or normal ones)
  

Heat griddle to high heat. Brush the tops and bottoms of the mushrooms with olive oil.
When the griddle is hot, place the mushroom bottom-side down on the griddle and sprinkle with salt, pepper, and garlic powder. Grill for 2-3 minutes.
Flip the mushrooms, sprinkle with salt, pepper, and garlic powder. Grill for 2-3 minutes.
After 2-3 has passed, fill the mushroom caps with pesto. Then dot with goat cheese. Cover the mushrooms with the lid of a soup pot (one that will cover the mushrooms completely without squishing them). The original recipe calls for these to be cooked on a grill, and to melt the cheese by covering the top of the grill. If you have a grill, you can do this, but if you're doing it on a griddle, then covering the mushrooms with a lid is as close as you're going to get. Just make sure the lid isn't plastic or anything.
Once the cheese has melted to your satisfaction, remove the mushrooms from the griddle.
Slice the tomatoes into appropriate slices and put them on the mushrooms.
Eat.

Thoughts: This was pretty delicious and pretty easy. It is not in the least bit healthy for you, despite the mushrooms and tomatoes. At least we're using olive oil, which has the right kind of fat. The kind of fat in goat cheese is NOT the right kind. You could probably substitute goat cheese for something like mozzarella, which would be WAY healthier. It would probably be pretty good too. Also you could lighten up on the pesto, which is like, 115 calories per 1/8th cup. So think about that. Overall, pretty delicious though.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Eggplant with Fish Sauce

Ingredients

• 2 tbsp salt
• 2 medium-sized eggplants
• 6 cups water
• 2 tbsp sugar
• 6 tbsp fish sauce
• 2 tbsp oil
• 2 tbsp chopped garlic
• 2 eggs
  
• chopped cilantro, for garnish

Dissolve the salt into the water. Chop up the eggplant into bite-sized pieces and add to the salt water. Soak for 5 minutes, then drain and set aside.
In a small bowl, add the fish sauce and sugar. Stir to dissolve sugar. Set aside.
Heat garlic and oil in a pan. Cook until garlic is crispy. Add the eggplant. Stir-fry for 1 minute. Add hte fish sauce/sugar. Stir-fry for another minute. Crack the eggs into the mixture. Cook until eggs are done.
Garnish with cilantro. Eat.

Thoughts: This dish was ALL RIGHT. The recipe looked promising, but we must have messed something up or something. The eggplant was SUPER chewy, but the recipe said to stir-fry it for like, a total of 3 minutes. So I don't think we undercooked it. Maybe we should have used some sort of Asian eggplant instead of the kind you usually find in grocery stores here? I think Asian eggplants usually have a LOT more flavor. Also, I cracked the eggs into the eggplant without whisking them first, so some parts of the egg were white and some were yellow. So it sort of looked unappetizing. This recipe was also SUPER salty. I got a headache after eating it. Too much fish sauce, maybe. If we were to make this again, I might cut the fish sauce down to like, 1 tbsp. Also because Dan hates the smell of fish sauce. And now our apartment smells like it. A lot. I think I'm going to be the only one eating the leftovers.

Disaster Index: 5/10 - we haven't made anything this bad in a while.

Key Lime Cheesecake

Incredibly successful
Ingredients

• Crust:
  
  
  
  • 12 graham crackers
    
  • 1/2 tsp salt
    
  • 1 stick butter
    
  
  
• Filling:
  
  
  
  • 16oz neufchatel cream cheese (2 packages)
    
  • heaping 2/3c granulated sugar
    
  • 2 eggs
    
  • 3tbsp key lime juice plus a little more to taste
    
  • 1tbsp lime zest plus more to taste (we used a lot)
    
  
  

Preheat the oven to 350. Crush the graham crackers with the salt. When they're ground fairly finely (we used a cuisinart) add the melted butter. Spread evenly and then press into the bottom of an 8.5" springform pan. Make sure the crust is really good and compacted. Bake for about 5 minutes or until set.

Meanwhile, just beat all of the other ingredients together. We used a whisk and did it by hand, though a kitchenaid would do wonders at this. Pour filling into cooled crust. In a separate pan with deep sides, add some water. Put it in the oven on a low rack and let it sit (oven closed) about five minutes to create a humid chamber. Now add the cheesecake onto an upper rack. Bake until the filling is set but still jiggles a little in the middle when you shake it, about 45 minutes. Let it cool completely and then cover with foil and refrigerate at least three hours before serving. Overnight is better. Serve!

Thoughts:This turned out great. The crust didn't release very well from the first slice, but I think there are ways to work around that. Otherwise, I would say this was just the ideal cheesecake. I just hope I transcribed the recipe correctly (we didn't write it down and it was sort of made up and cobbled together from a few recipes).

Disaster Index: 1/10

Latin American Peanut and Potato Soup

Ingredients

• 4 tbsp peanut oil
• 1 yellow onion, finely chopped
• 2 cloves crushed garlic
• 1 red bell pepper, seeded and chopped
• about 6 red potatoes, peeled and chopped
• 1 can chopped tomatoes (about 7 oz)
• 1.25 cups of unsalted peanuts
• 6.25 cups of beef stock (or veg)
  
• salt and pepper
• fresh cilantro, chopped
• honey
• cayenne pepper

Heat the oil in a large heavy saucepan over medium heat. Add onion and cook for about 5 minutes, until onion starts to soften.
Add the garlic, potatoes, pepper, and tomatoes. Stir well to coat everything evenly, then cover and cook for 5 minutes until softened.
Meanwhile, toast the peanuts by cooking them in a large dry frying pan over medium heat. Make sure they don't burn. Move them around often. You don't want burned peanuts.
Set a 1/4 cup of the toasted peanuts aside to use as a garnish. Put the rest in a food processor and grind them up. Add them to the vegetables.
When vegetables are done cooking, remove them from heat and transfer to a blender and blend until smooth.
Return mixture to the pot and stir in the beef stock. Bring to a boil, then lower heat and simmer for 10 minutes.
Serve, garnished with the chopped cilantro and toasted peanuts.

Thoughts: This wasn't too difficult to make, and it was pretty delicious. I had the thought of adding some cayenne pepper, and Dan had the thought of adding honey. They make lovely additions to this dish, so by all means, add them both (probably just before serving). Also, I had the idea that buying fresh, in-the-shell peanuts would be a good idea because they would taste more fresh. This is probably not true, and they were a pain in the ass to shuck. So just go ahead and buy the canned ones (as long as they aren't salted! Christ!). We're having a little bit of difficulty coming to a consensus about the rating on this one. It was an unobjectionable soup, but it wasn't particularly striking. I would probably make it again.

Disaster Index: 1-2/10

Update!
only use 3c water,
4 cups worth of beef bouillon
about 2-3 tbsp honey (until you can JUST taste the sweetness)
juice of 1/3 to 1/2 a lemon
pinch of salt
pepper
cayenne to taste

Proceed as usual. About half way through the vegetables being cooked, throw HALF of them in a blender with the 3c of water. Blend smooth and re-add to the other vegetables with the 4 cups of beef bouillon. Bring to a boil and cook until the chunks of potato are tender - 10 minutes or so. Take off the heat and add remaining ingredients, tasting after each addition.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Chicken Enchiladas II

We used "enchilada sauce" as a huge shortcut, and it worked very well.

Ingredients

• 1 15oz can "enchilada sauce"
  
• 1lb boneless skinless chicken breast, trimmed
  
• 1/2c water
  
• 1tsp garlic powder
  
• 2tsp cumin
  
• 1/2c chopped cilantro
  
• ~2c shredded monterey jack cheese
  
• ~6 large (10"?) flour tortillas or ~12 6" ones.
  

Combine enchilada sauce, water, garlic, and cumin in a large pot. Bring to a boil, add chicken, cover, and reduce to a simmer. Cook until the chicken is just done through (and a thermometer should read ~160*, though we don't have one) - about 10-12 minutes. If the chicken started out frozen, you'll probably have to remove the chicken after about 8 minutes, cut it into smaller pieces, and then add it back in for another 8 to 10 minutes. When the chicken is done, turn off the heat and remove the chicken to a plate and set aside.

Set the oven to 400 degrees. Shred the slightly cooled chicken using two forks. In a bowl, mix shredded chicken with 1/2 cup of enchilada sauce, 1c of cheese, and cilantro.

Stack all the tortillas on a plate and microwave them for about 40-60 seconds. Add about 1/3c (if you're using small tortillas) or 2/3c (if large) in a line down the middle of the tortilla. Roll tightly, and place seam-side down in a greased casserole pan. Repeat with all of the tortillas. Spray the tops of the tortillas with PAM. Pour the rest of the enchilada sauce evenly over the top, and then top with the remaining cheese. Bake for 20-25 minutes. I recommend using two spatulas to get them out of the pan.

Thoughts: I thought these were delicious, but Claire thought they needed a little more flavor. She prefers vegetables in her enchiladas. To that end, we sauteed some zucchini with some red and yellow onions. When they were done, we gave them the exact same treatment as the chicken (mix with cheese and cilantro, fill enchiladas, top with more sauce and cheese) and they turned out very well. Next time we will probably mix the vegetables in with the chicken. Also, we have some mole sauce, so next time we might make mole enchiladas, too, by pouring the mole over the top at the end rather than the enchilada sauce.

Disaster Index: 1/10

banana bread pancakes

Ingredients

• 1 banana, frozen and thawed
• 2 eggs
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1 cup whole wheat flower
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1/2 tsp vanilla
• 1/8 cup honey
• 1/2 cup chocolate chips
  
• pinch of cinnamon
• milk, until the batter is the right consistency

Peel the thawed banana and mash it into a bowl. Add eggs, baking powder, salt, vanilla, flour, honey, chips, and cinnamon. Don't use a whisk for this. The batter will just get all stuck up in the whisk. You don't want that.
Once it's mixed, start adding milk until the mixture is about the right consistency.
Make them on the griddle.

Thoughts: Delicious. Although we could have added a pinch more salt and like, WAY less chocolate chips. The pancakes were soooo chocolate-y. Tooooo chocolate-y. But using whole wheat flour is a good idea because it makes the texture very satisfying. These really taste like banana bread.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Chicken Fingers

A healthy take on chicken fingers: no deep frying involved.
Ingredients

• about 2lbs boneless skinless chicken breast, trimmed of excess fat.
  
• Brining Solution:
  
  
  
  • 2c buttermilk
    
  • 1tsp garlic powder
    
  • 2tbsp dijon mustard
    
  • 2tsp salt, 1tsp pepper
    
  
  
• Breading:
  
  
  
  • 3c cornflakes, crushed (about 2.5c crushed)
    
  • 3/4c bread crumbs
    
  • salt, pepper
    
  • 1tsp garlic powder
    
  • 1/8tsp cayenne
    
  • 1/2tsp paprika
    
  
  

Thaw chicken and cut into "strips" of appropriate / desired size. Mix all of the "brining" ingredients together in a large bowl. Place chicken strips in bowl and let sit for at least an hour (overnight is better), covered, in the fridge.

When that's done, preheat oven to 400. Mix "breading" components and season to taste. Working one piece at a time, remove a chicken strip and cover in breading mixture, making sure to press the breading firmly into each piece and to cover completely. Arrange chicken strips on a sheet pan, giving a little space between each one. Bake 35-45 minutes, or until golden brown and done in the middle.

Thoughts: Claire and I really enjoyed these (and they're very healthy by comparison. We had to substitute buttermilk for half-and-half + skim + vinegar. It still turned out well, actually. But next time we could try the actual recipe. Also, the breading probably could have used a bit more salt (and pepper).

Disaster Index: 1/10

key lime shrimp with mushrooms and rice

This is based off of a Bobby Flay recipe. The original calls for lobster tail, so...yeah, we didn't use that. Because we have no money.

Ingredients

• 8 ounces of cremini mushrooms, sliced
  
• 2 cups of small shrimps
• 1 scallion/green onion, sliced
  
• 2 tbsp white wine
• 1/2 cup key lime sauce (1/2 cup margarine, 1 tsp minced garlic, 1/2 tsp garlic powder, generous pinch of pepper, generous pinch of cayenne pepper, 2 tbsp fresh key lime juice)
• 1 cup medium-grain rice

Heat some olive oil in a saucepan over medium heat. Add sliced mushrooms and scallion and cook until the mushrooms start to sweat.
At the same time, start the rice. Add 1 cup rice with 2 cups water. Bring to a boil, uncovered. Then reduce to simmer, cover, and let it sit until done (about 10-15 minutes). Don't stir it too often or check on it too often, otherwise it will get soggy.
Make the key lime sauce. Just mix all the above ingredients together.
When the mushrooms are tender enough, add the key lime sauce and white wine. Let cook for about 2 minutes.
Add the shrimp. Since we used pre-cooked shrimp, we only had to cook them for like, a minute to heat them through. If you're using raw shrimp, you'll want to add them sooner. But don't overcook them either way.
Remove from heat, serve with the rice. Nom nom nom.

Thoughts: I would have preferred a little less lime juice in the key lime sauce. It was a little too citrus-y for me. But Dan liked it. He actually added more lime juice than was in the original recipe. Maybe next time we'll add the normal amount of lime juice and serve key limes on the side so people can add the amount they want. Overall, pretty darn delicious.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Leek Rings

We saw this on Good Eats and thought it might be worth giving it a shot.

Ingredients

• 1.5 cups of vegetable oil
• One large leek, cleaned and trimmed of the dark green leaves
• 1.5 cups milk
• 1 large egg
• 2 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 tsp salt plus more for seasoning

Put the vegetable oil in a saucepan and put over medium-high heat
Slice leeks into 1/2 inch rings and separate them.
Whisk together milk and egg.
In another bowl, combine the flour and salt. Then divide this mixture up into two equal portions in two shallow pans (or whatever you have).
Dip the rings in the 1st flour mixture, then dip them in the liquid mixture, then coat them in the 2nd flour mixture.
Fry the rings until golden brown. Drain on a paper towel. Season with salt.

Thoughts: This was ok. Dan didn't like them one bit. I didn't necessarily MIND them, but after eating enough of them I got sort of sick because they were so greasy. And a lot of them got burned because we couldn't keep the oil at a stable temperature. Plus leeks aren't as flavorful as onions, so they sort of tasted like nothing. Just grease. I wouldn't recommend this.

Disaster Index: 7/10

Tomato Vodka Cream Sauce

Ingredients

• 28oz diced tomatoes, canned
  
• 2 medium yellow onions, chopped
  
• 2-3 cloves of garlic (we used jarred)
  
• 1/4c vodka
  
• 1c half and half
  
• 1tbsp butter, and some olive oil
  
• salt and pepper to taste
  

This is actually quite simple to make. Melt the butter in a few tbsp olive oil. Add the onions and garlic and sauté until the onions are translucent. Throw in the tomatoes and cook uncovered until most of the liquid cooks off. Depending on the surface area of your pot (and the heat of your burner) this could take anywhere from about 8 to 25 minutes. Add the half and half and the vodka and stir well. Again, let this cook about 2-4 minutes until it's thickened. Be careful - it will continue to thicken once you take it off the heat. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Now you can either serve as is or (like us) you can throw it in a blender on a low setting until it's relatively smooth. Serve over pasta.

Thoughts: Delicious. Just great. Seriously. Maybe could use some red pepper flakes? Maybe not.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Spinach Matzo Meal Gnocchi

Don't try this at home. Seriously, don't.

Ingredients

• 3 russet potatoes, peeled and chopped into smaller pieces
  
• 2 eggs
  
• matzo meal "cake flour" (finely ground matzo meal) (a lot of it - 2-4 cups?)
  
• 10oz frozen spinach, mostly thawed
  
• salt, pepper
  
• a little oil for frying
  

Boil the potatoes in water until tender. Drain with a slotted spoon and place in a cuisinart. Add spinach, salt, and pepper. Pulse a few times. Add eggs and pulse again. Now, slowly add matzo meal flour until the mixture forms a dough, which it probably won't ever do. Boiling these gnocchi doesn't work (we tried it). Instead, heat up some oil in a pan or on a griddle. Form dough into little gnocchigli and fry lightly until browned. Serve with herb cream sauce.

Thoughts: these won't adhere in the middle because of something having to do with matzo meal. I don't really understand it. Boiling them was a horrible mistake. Frying them worked pretty well, but they still weren't really very good. I don't think we're ever going to try this again. And doesn't pasta KIND OF defeat the spirit of Passover, anyway?

Disaster Index: 8/10

English Muffins

Based on Alton Brown's recipe. We never have powdered milk or shortening, so there are some substitutions. We'll see if it works out.

Ingredients

• 1tbsp sugar + a little
  
• 1tsp salt
  
• 2c unbleached white flour
  
• 2.25tsp yeast
  
• 1 + 1/3c warmed milk with
  
• 1tbsp butter melted into it
  

Put flour in a bowl, and whisk in the sugar, salt, and yeast. Warm the milk in the microwave and melt the butter into it. It should be warm enough that you can comfortably put your finger into it - you don't want it to be too hot or you will kill the yeast. Add the milk mixture to the flour and stir together. Cover and let sit for about half an hour.

When it's done sitting, heat a griddle to 300 degrees. Place metal rings such as cookie cutters or small cans with both ends cut off (cans like you get tuna or bamboo shoots in) on the griddle. Spray with PAM. Add batter to the rings (how much? I don't really know. It's trial and error. Maybe 1/8 cup.) and cover with something (like a cookie sheet). After 5 or 6 minutes, flip the ring and cook the other side of the muffin. Take them off and you're done.

Thoughts: Some of the english muffins (though not all) had a tendency to look a little underdone in the middle. This was because I used too much batter for the mold, but it was tough to tell when I was making them. Maybe I should systematize this. Otherwise, these turned out quite nice. Just make sure to split them with a fork rather than cutting them in half with a bread knife.

Disaster Index: 2/10

Limpa Bread II

This is another limpa bread recipe. We bought way too much rye flour so we've decided to make a new limpa bread recipe every week until the flour is used up. Stay tuned.

Ingredients

• 1 pkg yeast
• 1 cup warm water
• 1 tbp sugar
• 1 cup hot water
• 1/2 cup + 2 tbp brown sugar
• 1.5 tsp salt
• 3 tbp molasses
  
• 2 tbp butter
• 2 tsp caraway seeds
• 1/2 tsp fennel seeds
• grated rind of large orange
• 2 cups rye flour
• 5 cups all-purpose flour

Mix yeast, lukewarm water, and sugar in a container. Let it sit.
In a large mixing bowl, combine hot water, brown sugar, salt, butter, seeds, and orange rind. Stir and cool to a lukewarm temperature.
Add the risen yeast and 1 cup rye flour; beat vigorously until batter is smooth.
Add another cup of rye flour and 2 cups of normal flour. Mix well.
Now add enough normal flour to form a soft dough (lots). Knead dough for about 10 minutes.
Do the microwave trick. Put in greased bowl and cover with saran wrap. Put in microwave (don't turn it on, obv.) for an hour, or until the dough has doubled in volume.
Divide dough in half. For each half, press it into a rectangle, dimple it with your knuckles, fold it in thirds, press it flat again, fold it in thirds the other way, and form it into a loaf. Set each half to rise for another hour.
Preheat oven for 350 F. When preheated, slash the top of the bread loaf and brush it with water. Put the bread in the oven and cook for 45 minutes.
Eat.

Thoughts: This was pretty good. It was easier to make than the other recipe, but it could have used more molasses. If we were to use this recipe, we would definitely brush the top with molasses before baking, and we would also sprinkle seeds over the top. Otherwise it was comparable.

Chicken Curry with Bamboo Shoots

This is also based off of one of my dad's recipes.

Ingredients

• 1 lb boneless chicken breast
• 1 can sliced bamboo shoots
• 2 tbp red curry paste
• 2 cups coconut milk
• 1 cup fresh Thai basil leaves, torn
• 1 tbp fish sauce
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1.5 tsp brown sugar
• 12 kaffir lime leaves
• 3 segments of lemongrass, bruised.
  

Wash the chicken and cut it into whatever size you want. If the bamboo shoots aren't already sliced, slice them. Usually they come sliced though, so it shouldn't be a problem.
Pour 1 cup of the coconut milk into a pan. The recipe says "wok", so use a wok if you have one. We don't, so we just used a saucepan-type-thing. Bring to a boil over medium high heat, stirring constantly. Add the chili paste. Cook until the coconut milk is reddish. Add the lemongrass.
Add the chicken and saute until the chicken turns white. I don't know how you'll be able to tell, since it's sitting in red sauce. Just do your best. Don't eat raw chicken.
Add the rest of the coconut milk, the bamboo shoots, fish sauce, salt, brown sugar, and lime leaves. Bring to a boil again. Then add the torn basil. Turn off the heat.
Eat.
Steam some rice with this and eat it.

Thoughts: This was totally killer. I could have used another tbp of fish oil, but Dan doesn't really like it all that much. He actually doesn't want to put any fish sauce in it. So we'll have to think about that. Next time Dan also thinks we should steam the rice in a rice basket rather than like, cooking it on the stove top. Jasmine rice would be better too. We just used plain long-grain rice. I would eat this all the time. And it took like, no time at all.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Tom Yum Soup

This is based off of a recipe that my dad sent me.
Ingredients

• 4 cups chicken stock (or veg)
  
• 15 kaffir lime leaves
• 3 large lemongrass stalks, cleaned, bruised, and cut into 2-inch segments
• 3.5 tbp freshly squeezed lime juice --> should be 1 tbs
  
• 3 green onions, chopped
• 1/2 cup chopped cilantro
  
• 10 ounces firm tofu
• 1 can straw mushrooms
• 1 tbp roasted chili paste
• 2 tsp brown sugar
• 1/2 tsp soy sauce
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 cup rice, mixed with 2 cups chicken stock (or veg) (if you want to eat this with rice) --> should be 3 cups
  

In a large soup pot, bring the chicken stock to a boil over high heat. When stock is boiling, add the lemongrass and half of the lime leaves. We cracked them down the center (without breaking them) to release the flavors a little bit.
Reduce heat to a simmer and cook for about 5 minutes, until the lemongrass turns sort of a brown color.
While the soup is cooking, mix the green onions, the lime juice, the rest of the lime leaves (again, cracked down the center), and some cilantro in a large serving bowl. Stir to combine. Set aside.
After the soup is done simmering, scoop out the lemongrass stalks and discard. You don't want to eat these.
Raise the soup heat to high again and add the straw mushrooms, the brown sugar, the soy sauce, the salt, the tofu, and the chili paste. Stir well to combine. When the soup begins to boil, remove the soup from heat and add it to the serving bowl.
We cooked the rice with chicken stock and ate it with this soup. But you don't have to. Or you could use rice noodles as well (this might work better, actually).

Thoughts: This was really easy to make. It took like, 40 minutes (rice included). By itself, the soup probably took closer to 20.
Also, I misread the original recipe that my dad sent me and accidentally put 3 tbs of lime juice in the soup, so it was a little citrus-y for me. In the future, I would put like, 1 tbs in and then serve the soup with lime wedges on the side so people can control the amount of lime juice in the soup. If you find that the soup is too sour, add more brown sugar and that should cut the sourness.
Also, I intentionally put in half of the chili paste as was in the original recipe, and I'm glad I did because there was quite a bit of heat from just the 1 tsp.
I would say that shrimp would probably be good in this recipe too, if you aren't fond of tofu.
Overall, pretty killer recipe.

Disaster index: 2/10. pretty solid. thanks dad.

Swedish limpa bread

Ingredients

• 1.5 cup all-purpose flour (plus extra, as needed. You'll see)
• 1/2 cup rye flour
• 1 package active dry yeast
• 1 tbp sugar
• 1.5 tsp grated orange peel
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/2 tsp crushed fennel seed
• 1/2 tsp crushed caraway seed
• 3/4 cup water (plus 4 tsp, for later)
• 3 tbp molasses (plus 1 tbp, for later)
• 2 tbp butter
• 2 tsp coffee
• 1/2 tsp whole fennel seeds
• 1/2 tsp whole caraway seeds

Combine the all-purpose flour, rye flour, yeast, sugar, orange peel, salt, and crushed seeds in a large bowl. Whisk to combine. Set aside.
In a small saucepan, heat 3/4 cup water, 3 tbp molasses, and 2 tbp butter over low heat until it reaches about 120-130 degrees F. We just guessed on this one. Heat it for about 5 minutes or something. Stir in the coffee.
Stir the water/molasses/butter/coffee mixture into the dry ingredients with a rubber spatula. The resulting dough will be very sticky. Very sticky. And it won't look like bread dough. Add extra all-purpose flour until it does look like bread dough.
Turn in out onto a well-floured surface and knead for about 2 minutes. Cover with an inverted bowl and let sit for 5 minutes.
Continue kneading the dough for another 5-8 minutes, until the dough is smooth and elastic.
Shape dough into a ball, place in a large greased bowl (we used pam) and also pam the top of the dough. Loosely cover with greased plastic wrap.
Do the microwave trick and let the dough rise in the microwave for 75 minutes.
Turn dough out onto counter. Using your hands, press the dough down into a rectangle. Use your knuckles to dimple the bread. Fold the bread in thirds (the short way), press it out again with your hands, then fold it in thirds in the other direction. Pinch the seams shut. Drop this rectangle into the bread pan.
Cover loosely with plastic wrap and do the microwave trick again. Let it rise for an hour.
Preheat the oven to 350 F.
Stir remaining 4 tsp water together with 1 tbp molasses. Set aside.
After an hour, uncover the bread and make 3 diagonal slashes in the top of the dough. Use a bread knife or steak knife for this or else it won't work. Trust me. I've tried.
Bake for 20 minutes. Take bread out of oven and brush the top liberally with the molasses mixture. Sprinkle the top with the whole caraway and fennel seeds.
Bake for another 10 minutes. Take bread out of oven and brush top with molasses again. The top should be starting to look pretty dark at this point. This is normal. It is not burned.
Bake for another 10 minutes. Take the bread out. Let it cool in the pan for 5 minutes.
Turn the bread out and let cool for another 5 minutes. Eat it.
Ok. I'll just tell you right now. We skipped 2 out of 3 of the final steps. Can you guess which ones?

Thoughts: This was pretty sweet. And also delicious. I was worried that the amount of molasses in the bread would make it totally gross, but you can't really even taste it. The caraway and fennel are killer. Dan can't think of anything to add. We bought WAY more rye flour than we needed for this recipe, so chances are, we'll make this bread again, but using a different recipe. More to follow.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Meatballs

This is based off of a Rachel Ray recipe.

Ingredients

• ~2 lbs ground chuck/beef/sirloin/whatever. You could even use turkey.
• 2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
• 1 egg
• 1/2 cup Italian breadcrumbs
• 2 tbs garlic, minced
• 1 tbs dried parsley
  
• salt and pepper

Preheat oven to 425 F.
Mix all ingredients together with your hands in a largish mixing bowl.
Make balls of about 1/2 inch and place on non-stick cookie sheet.
Bake in oven for about 10 minutes.

Thoughts: This recipe was ridiculously easy and quick. And it was also delish.

Disaster Index: 1/10

Peanut Butter Pancakes

Ingredients

• 1 cup whole wheat flour
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 2 eggs, beaten
• 1/4 cup honey
• 1/2 tsp vanilla
• 1/2 cup peanut butter
• milk, until it looks right

Stir together flour, salt, and baking powder.
In a separate bowl, combine eggs, honey, vanilla, and peanut butter.
Add the liquid mixture into the dry mixture and stir well. Slowly start adding milk until it looks right. Stir until smooth.
Make pancakes.

Thoughts: Rather than serving these with syrup, I recommend serving them with jam. What you can do is this: scoop out as much jam as you need, put it in a saucepan, and add a little water (a few tablespoons). Cook on medium heat until the jam starts to break down and get more liquid-y. You will need to stir constantly because it will be sticky. Once most of the lumps are out of the jam, remove it from heat and pour it over the pancakes. Nom nom nom.
I could personally use more peanut butter in these things, but Dan seems pretty happy with the flavor.

Disaster Index: 1-2/10

Bread from a Sponge

This is Alton Brown's recipe.

Ingredients

• 1 lb flour
  
• 10oz water
  
• 1tsp yeast
  
• 2tsp honey
  
• 2tsp salt
  
• 1tbsp cornstarch mixed with 1/6c water
  

Mix 5oz flour, all the water, .25tsp yeast, and all the honey in a container. This is called a sponge. Cover it and refrigerate for 8 to 12 hours (or, for a stronger flavor, as far as I can tell, DON'T refrigerate for 8-12 hours). At the end of this period, mix the flour, salt, and remaining yeast in the bowl of a kitchen aid. Add the sponge and, using a dough hook, mix until combined. Cover with a towel and let it rest for 20 minutes, then start mixing the dough again with the dough hook to knead the dough, alternating between low and high speed for about 10 minutes - until you can pull the dough into a thin sheet you can almost see through without it breaking.

Now set the dough in a humid environment to rise until doubled, about an hour. I like to boil water in the microwave and then set the bowl in there. When it's doubled, turn the dough out onto a floured surface. Press into a rectangle with your fingers and fold in three, like a letter. Press it out again and fold it in the other direction (again, in three parts). Now draw the corners into the middle and turn it over in your hand. Now there are four "new" corners (what were previously the middle of each edge before you drew the corners the first time). Draw each of those into your hand to tighten the smooth side of the dough. Now, on a lightly floured surface pass the ball around in a circle between your hands, keeping it upright, to tighten the top and smooth out the bottom (as far as I can tell).

Set the dough on a surface well floured with cornmeal and cover for another hour. Preheat oven for 400. After the hour, paint the dough with the corn starch mixture, and then slash the dough a couple of times using a serrated knife. Place the dough on a pizza stone (or if you don't have it, a baking dish, I guess) and bake for 50 minutes, until brown. Let sit 30 minutes before slicing.

Thoughts: This recipe is amazing. I've had some difficulty with "kneading" the bread in the kitchen aid, but this may be related to the age of my appliance. Is it from the 1970s? Appearances say yes. Anyway, next time I make it I may knead it with my hands after combined. The hardest part so far has been transferring the completed bread to the pizza stone, which needs to be hot. Not sure what to do there. Suggestions?

One of our favorite breads after making it only twice.

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